"What is ur deepest fear? " -- Coach Carter

I watched this movie "Coach Carter" (based on true life). Its about this basketball coach who brings about deep transformation in the lives of a bunch of unruly, but, really talented basketball players (also, high school kids). Throughout the main parts of the movie he randomly throws this question at one particular player --> "What is your deepest fear?" At the very peak point in the movie, that player gives him the answer....

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us. We ask ourselves - who are we to be brilliant, beautiful, talented and fabulous. But honestly, who are you not to be so?"
"You are a child of God, small games do not work in this world. For those around us to feel peace, it is not example to make ourselves small. We were born to express the glory of God that lives in us. It is not in some of us, it is in all of us. While we allow our light to shine, we unconsciously give permission for others to do the same. When we liberate ourselves from our own fears, simply our presence may liberate others."

This answer made my hair stand on end. I've found one of the missing pieces of the jigsaw puzzle that defines my life.

This moved me so much that I couldn't push off writing about it to the next day, so inspite of it being past my bedtime, its certain moments like these{emotional highs} that calls for making exceptions. :) :) :)

So U think U can beat Me.....Yeah!!! thats' Not gonna happen....

Heard that on one particular day the "Fittest of the Fit" contest was being held. Thought that I go to the gym anyway, so I might as well participate for the heck of it and also to get some good trained supervised workout.....Well, what do you know....I ended up winning the contest (in the women's division). This serves as the encouragement and motivational factor enough to keep me working hard on my fitness for the rest of the year until the next competition that is..... :)

There was a time when I was so unfit and fat in an unhealthy way, that the doctor's had sort of warned me of being about to cross the borderline to being obese. It was my "will power" that served as my saving grace. Well, once I started getting in shape there was no looking back after that.

And to win a competition as this, just made me look back on those fatty days and remain grateful for the progress and the change that's happened....

Moving back to the "fittest of the fit" contest....So, what did I win? I got a certificate, a really cool t-shirt (military print and the words that form the title of this post at the back), an even more awesome water bottle (it has this freeze stick that can keep water ice cold for a very long time....just perfect for the sunny days) and yeh, last but not the least, a pencil.....

Life has its way of throwing surprises every now and then.....for which, I shall remain eternally grateful......

It is about to be finished!!!

gosh !!! I'm feeling crazy pangs of anxiety right now....and why so? well, I am about to go today to complete one of my tattoos. This had been in the pipeline since a long time now...How long? well about a year......today just feels like the right day to get it completed.....

That's the picture of what it looks like right now. I now need to get palms tattooed around it. My tattoo is explained as follows:- the cherub symbolizes me, the hands(that i'm about to get) around the cherub symbolize the hands' of God, there's a banner above the cherub with the words "Ut Amen et Foveam"(in latin) inscribed in it......So, all the pieces taken together mean--> God created me so that "I may love and cherish" or "Ut Amen et Foveam"......





Every tattoo that I've gotten have marked a significant event in my life.....and surely this is how its going to be for every tattoo I will get eventually.....
gosh!!! right now I'm wondering that there are gonna be so many significant events, I wonder how I'm gonna manage the space... :)
my thoughts about getting tattoos is that "that's the only wordly impression that I will take with me to my grave, and this is the expression I want to use".....

When I first got the news that I was accepted to UTD, I got my first tattoo to mark that event. It also served as a reminder to give me strength in all my endeavors. So that whenever I felt demotivated or I was ready to give up, I could look at the tattoo and say "Alright, whatever I am feeling right now is nothing in comparison to this"...So yeh, that was the rationale behind the tattoo....This tattoo inspires me to be "Courageous"





Now, the tattoo of the cherub was used to mark the internship that I got in the summer of 2009. It indicated God's hand and protection around me at all times. At that phase I always managed to maintain a positive attitude, and well, God only needed me to trust in His plans for me. Off-course there were times when my faith was badly shaken, that's the beauty of it, that God loves me. The situation around was so grim, so many people loosing their jobs and what not, that I was frightened within at times. I now realize how stupid I'd been to feel like that. It just seemed so right to feel that way then. However, I now know I need to live everyday of my life like there's gonna be no tomorrow. But, if asked whether I wanted to go back and change anything about that experience or my reaction to that situation, I would say a big NO. It was that experience that's made me this eternal optimistic person I am today and so it served as a great platform to learn and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.


The completed version of the tattoo, with the added hands of God marks the admit I got into UTD's Ph.D. program, which is a giant leap for me....

The entire tattoo inspires me to always have hope, faith and love in my heart, soul and mind.....